The Lows And The Most Amazing Highs Of My Second Year Sober
Brief Back Story Leading To 2 Year No Beer
Well guys its here my 2 year no beer anniversary of been sober. Back on June 1st 2016 when I’d decided on my stop date I had the worse fears about giving up the one thing I loved and hated in equal measures. Drink was my life and when I say that I don’t say it lightly. I was drinking on average 12 pints of lager a day and that was every single day. The only time I wasn’t drinking was the hours I spent with my daughter. Even then though I was counting down the hours and watching the clock for her going home so that I could get to my favourite place the pub. Yes alcohol was more enjoyable for me than spending time with my daughter of 4 years.
See I was a single parent I only had my daughter twice after nursery in week and on a Saturday through day with odd overnights at weekends.We never really bonded as I was always hungover on a Saturday and had no energy to get off the sofa, let alone no money to spend to go anywhere as that money was needed for me to go to pub with. So the thought of giving up my lager forever was daunting to say the least. All I’d known for my adult life was drinking, since age of 14 or 15 when I first had my sip of alcohol I never looked back. It took away all the pains I had all the bad feelings it just numbed my whole body and made me drift away for a few hours to hide from whatever was bothering me at the time.
Life Pressures And How I Found Sobriety
It obviously got worse with age and pressures of life. Breakdown of relationships and going from working in a job that should of been a career for life and screwing it up all thanks to drink. To a job that paid nothing on a building site through to going and starting up a business with my brother. Which I failed at as well, that put me on the dole for over 2 years until I found a driving job. Which is what I’m still doing to this day albeit I’ve moved from van driver to now an heavy goods driver. As I say at start of this as I’m warbling on
Maybe your reading this on my blog TheSoberYorkshireman.co.uk or watching the video on OYNB. Either way your possibly wondering why or how I’ve reached 2 years no beer when I drunk so much daily. Well here goes let me try explain my reasons and my inspirations. Firstly a massive shout out has to go to Ruari Fairburns and Andy Ramage co-founders of OYNB. Without stumbling across their website back in May 2016 I wouldn’t be sober I know that not only is their programme the best way to get sober. it’s the support they have given me and the freedom to help inspire others and support others that has helped me stay this way.
Start Of Year One
So Year one I’ll try make it a quick summary all though it possibly won’t be. As I said I found OYNB in May sat in the pub one night after work. I started their 90 day programme but I knew it’d be 365 and forever and so did Ruari as he saw something in me he even sent me a 365 t-shirt when I’d only ordered the 90 day one. I also knew that I needed more of a support than just OYNB so I checked myself into rehab a weekly meeting at ForwardLeeds. Thats how year one started what I couldn’t account for is where it was going to take me.
The friends I made on OYNB was just the start so a massive shout out to Mark Rees, Christine Penrose, Liz Ottoson, Amie Symonds, Anna Stokes, Helen Randle, Felicia McIntyre, Micheal Gonclaves, Elizabeth Canavan, Jarlath Gantly, Alan Desmond, Derek Ryan, Sue Ballington and many many more I apologise for those I missed out.
Progression Of Year One
That was just the start, my bonding with my daughter went from strength to strength, she started sleeping every weekend. We started going places as I had money and energy. I even saw her laugh at the cinema something I’d never seen before as we’d never been there it cost too much. I started hosting OYNB socials and meeting others that were on same journey. This even took me to Dublin where I incorporated celebrating my mates 50th birthday weekend with meeting up with OYNB members. Then In January as I knew I was inspiring people I created my blog TheSoberYorshireman to help others like me.
As all I found when I was looking for inspirational sober blogs were women who had given up drink, nothing from a northern bloke with a dependancy. I then ran my first half marathon, along with many 10k races. This inspired me to join a triathlon team. I started to lose weight and get my diet in check. I also started saving up for a mortgage. The final thing was going away to Spain to meet my OYNB best friend Mark Rees and celebrate my one year of sobriety. The best thing about coming to the end of year 1 was hearing how proud my family was of me as I’ve always been a let down to them.
Now what about year two. Well this was year I wasn’t expecting to be so great as it started in a slump. I hit a real low after coming home from Spain. The euphoria of going a year sober was hit by a massive low spell in part due to well I’ve done what it says on the tin OneYearNoBeer what next. It took me well over two months to get my head round year two. I had no urges to drink that wasn’t even a thought, it was just what to do next. I started by training hard in the pool as I wanted to compete as a triathlete something I had enjoyed training for, I also wanted to take my running to the next level.
It got to mid October and I was back on track enjoying year 2 it was then I decided to start a career change and many other things. I set myself up as an online PT and coach, started to qualify as a PT, and started coaching people. Then I started an OYNB mastermind course to become a better me. This spurred me on to quit caffeine forever I drunk way too much of it. I was on a roll so I signed up to a marathon and not only that I started chatting to an amazing woman on another sober group. All this in such a short space of time became too overwhelming.
By new year all my world crashed around me except for three things. One was my now girlfriend as our relationship blossomed after spending new year together. Secondly was the training for my first marathon, albeit not super read about Marathon Training which I completed in May with my friend Sue. Finally it was been asked in January to be my little brother’s best man, One Of My Proudest Moments this was utter shock. It just showed how proud he was of who I’d become.
Where’s this left me now heading into year 3. Finding Love my girlfriend and I are going from strength to strength even though we live 200 miles apart. We aim to see each other every 2 weeks and she was by side as I completed the marathon. I’ve put all the PT training and coaching on the back burner as I’ve too much going on in my private life to change my career just yet. I’m still going to run and weight train and support people on my fitness group just not make it a paying thing just yet.
Looking Forward To New Challenges And Thanks
As I head into year three I’ve more challenges set, one is become a plant based athlete and stop eating animal based products. Two is to run another marathon, also get my body fat into single figures. Three is to be the best, best man I can be for my brother and give him the best stag do I can and speech at his wedding. My final challenge will be to keep my blog updated as I have neglected it of recent times. I got a boost to that in the last few days when I came 4th in https://blog.feedspot.com/uk_living_sober_blogs/
I want to finally say a massive thanks to all my family for their unconditional support. I messed the fuck up over a lot of years I hope I’m finally repairing that. So thank you Mum, Dad, Garry, Vicky, Dean, Paul, Derren, Grandad, Rene. All their partners Claire, Big Dean, Becky, Denise, Debbie. All my nieces and nephews, Kelsey, Olivia, Bentley, Farrah, Brook and Baby Bump. Last but most importantly the two girls in my life that brighten it everyday my daughter Elishia and girlfriend Claire love you both.
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